April Fools! The importance of humour with the elderly
We all like a joke, and there’s a reason why people say laughter is the best medicine. Humour improves your well-being in multiple different ways, as well as strengthening the relationships with those around you.
And yet, there’s been a slight pullback in joking with the elderly. It’s sometimes assumed that an older person wouldn’t understand a complex joke, or that their humour is too different to be relatable to younger generations.
But this isn’t always the case. And even if it was the case, humour is essential for social bonds, and excluding older people from this experience is unfair. We need to find relief and some point of human connection, at every age.
Why should we joke?
Humour brings people together, allowing a moment of peace and relief in an overwhelming world. Because of this, humour is seen as a mood stabiliser. It’s been shown to reduce stress, anxiety and depression, as well as even having physical benefits such as a boosted immune system and pain relief.
Humour is also essential for communication. It’s a goldmine for creativity and ‘thinking outside of the box’ – especially when saying something that subverts societal expectations. This is often mismatched between generations, making it all the more important to joke with those both younger and older than you. Finding a funny point of connection helps nurture those intergenerational relationships, which again strengthens social bonds.
What can we laugh about?
There’s a common misconception that older people are fragile, and that often prevents people from having a bit of banter. But the elderly love humour just as much as the younger generations! Of course, every joke needs to have a layer of respect behind it. And humour is subjective – if it’s not wanted, don’t force it.
Jokes should never have the intention of causing harm, so uphold a mutual understanding of each other whenever possible. We need to laugh with the elderly, not at them. And taking the time to fully comprehend an older loved one’s humour can be a gateway into preventing this mocking feeling, and encouraging more meaningful conversations with them.
This is the same for the hotly debated age jokes, and it’s important to not assume all old people will react the same way. Some people prefer talking and joking openly about aging, and some would rather not make their age a point of humour. Both approaches are completely acceptable, and it is not for you to decide which one is best for your elderly loved one.
If a joke is not automatically lifting the mood, then it’s probably not a good joke! And if a joke is actively made at the expense of someone else, then it is harmful. Older people have a lifetime of experience and hundreds of stories to tell, so make a habit of encouraging the funny memories.
Does humour change as we age?
Aging has been shown to affect humour experiences, with research suggesting that elderly people enjoy humour more than younger people, but they have increasing difficulties in understanding jokes. This again shows the need for us to adapt our humour accordingly, so older individuals aren’t excluded from the joke.
Making the effort to have conversations with older people will help you understand their humour and boundaries. Some people are cheekier, whereas some have more dry senses of humour. And of course, not everyone’s in the mood for a joke all the time!
Older people are multifaceted, with a full life and years’ worth of memories. Let them laugh and connect with you, and hear the important things they have to say. Assuming the elderly can’t joke around isn’t a fair perception – it’s patronising. And when you exclude old people from the joke, you exclude them from socially connecting with others. Taking the time to understand their humour is therefore essential in preventing this social isolation.
Older people are up for a laugh, and they deserve as many giggles as anyone else!
At Birchwood House, we like a laugh. Being a true home-from-home, we go the extra mile to ensure residents receive the highest quality care, and highest quality jokes. Contact us today to see how we can best support you or your loved one.
